Skinned

Jeepney passengers

It's the most embarrassing, and, at the same time, the most heartwarming experience to be spoken of in a very high esteem, especially when it is done in a room full of total strangers, by someone whose opinion you value. I experienced this when I recently gave a talk to a group of college students in Manila. My friend had to introduce me as the speaker; she projected me as someone who deserved a star named after him. hehe. I am  maybe exaggerating a bit, but that was the effect on me. I never thought that a single-page letter-sized resume spanning seven years of work history could present me as such. My resume is not much, I tell you. If it was something, it would have scored me some college jobs, or at least job interviews when I was applying  for them last year. However, the small details that were not part of my resume were the ones that I was particularly happy about because the information she added was based on her personal knowledge and perception of me. Here is one reference to this blog:

 “…he maintains a blog in which he makes a seemingly mundane activity a source of insight, inspiration, and intellectual realizations. His writings reveal a patriotic Filipino citizen behind the mestizo appearance.”

Well, she said it not I, and I am not going to affirm what she says about this blog although I would like to believe that they are true, but my statistics indicate that I have not been able to sustain readership.  That will not stop me from writing, however.

Going back, of the other things she said about me, I was quite surprised with the ‘mestizo’ label. I don’t think you’ll ever spot me in a jeep as my looks cannot demand any attention. Years ago, I might have had that light complexion, but the same cannot be said now.  Years of exposure to the environment, neglect and aging, perhaps, have all contributed to the state of my skin. When I take my shirt off, I see the outline of a white shirt on my body. My face and neck and my arms have shade different from the body.

Having lived in a coastal city in my growing up years, I was making the beach my weekend destination. I did not care much about my complexion. I had many classmates who were light-skinned, and they did not pay much attention to it. Only when I got here in Manila did I realize that having a light complexion was a prized attribute. 

Since I share the many Filipinos’ mentality that white is beautiful, I try to reverse the changes. I did buy those sunscreen and whitening lotion to even out my arms and face. Nothing has worked as I seem to jell well with most Pinoys as the months pass.

I am not embarrassed revealing this; jeepney and tryke drivers seem to be as concerned with their skin as I am. I see them put ‘sleeves’ on them. If not scrutinized well, the flesh-colored ‘sleeves’ with designs look like real arms heavily adorned with tattoos.

With the lifestyle I am living, meaning the commuting, the swimming and the walking, I am foretelling a darker future. I am not so desperate that I’ll to be taking those injectibles and tablets soon, however. I’ll probably stay away from the sunshine vitamin as much as I can.

I’m not to be undressing in front of people as the uneven skin and the lard-infested body are not a good sight to behold; however, anything that exposes me through the work I do and the life I lead will be a preferred form of stripping.  I realized that the introduction my friend gave me was an account of a life that had lived acceptably. I think I like what I heard. I think I intend to keep my life that way.

I hope I did not sound proud. I am just grateful, that’s all.

Jeepney barker